Out of context
by Glasond
Summary: The pros and cons of living with a mass murderer. Bulma, Vegeta, a not so unrealistic conversation.


Disclaimer: the original story of Dragonball Z and any of its characters belong to Akira Toriyama

Author's note: I apologize for any grammar mistake, I'm currently looking for a skillful beta reader (if you are one, you like the story and you rock with punctuations, PM me). The story is set after the end of DBZ, before the GT events and I'm presupposing the Sayajins existence has not been publicly acknowledged yet.

* * *

**Out of context**

"Give me that!"  
The lungs of the Sayajin prepubescent girl made their way above all the kitchen noise.  
Given her uncommon legacy, Bulla could have easily destroyed an entire electronic store and bought a new one with her pocket money, if she so wished; yet, the particular piece of technology she was interested in - say the television remote control- was at the moment in the hands of the only other being on the planet with an equivalent bank account and a far more greater destructive potential, namely her brother.

It was not for a real need, then, but for healthy siblings competition that she craved to have it back.  
That and the fact Trunks had switched from her favorite Tv series to WCN news while she was eating.  
Of course "Make me" was the only natural response to her demanding and so the consequent dinner bantering increased in scale.

Strangely enough for all of those who knew about his ferocious past, the only authentic Sayajin in the room was not letting his temper raise over his children exceedingly noisy argument. Ignoring the screaming hell taking place all around, he was quietly devouring the 3000 pieces share of the maki moriawase set in front of him.  
Eventually, her daughter calmed down and left the room with an indignant pace, bringing various bowls and plates along with her, surely headed for the wide screen in the lounge room.  
Had his opponent given up, Trunks turned to face the Tv and, as to prove his point, started watching the news like it was the most entrancing thing in the world.  
That left the two adults at the other end of the table in quite peaceful isolation.

Seated on the stool across from Vegeta, Bulma had just put aside her apron and was currently pondering, chopsticks in hand, if she wanted tuna or crab first.  
The Sayajin took it as a sign to start civil conversation.  
"How did it go with the executives? Did you make up your mind about telling them the truth behind the space craft?"  
"Nah, I thought about what you said yesterday, they are probably not ready to acknowledge aliens existence, let alone accept their boss is dating one"  
That made Vegeta smirk.  
"What about you? Goku said you left early, so I figured you must have came home to work on that pod translator you promised to help me fix. Ten days ago"  
"I promised I'd work on it, but I never specified when"  
"Hey, isn't that supposed to be one of my lines?"  
"You are welcome to shut up and be a Sayajin anytime, woman"  
"So funny I could cry. I swear, If you used your sense of humor in battle, that would be the end of Goku"  
"I'll keep it for you, weakling; I prefer punches with Kakarot than punchlines, he's far to stupid to mock"  
Bulma actually smiled at that.  
"Braggart... and a lazy one, at that. Why am i not surprised by your scarce consideration towards my tech project, anyway?"  
"Probably because I despise any tech project I cannot knock down"  
"That makes sense"

Dinner continued in companionable silence until the teenage boy finished his meal.  
With a clashing sound of plates being gathered, Trunks curtly excused himself with a "Gotta go, Goten is throwing a party"

Vegeta made a disapproving sound after his son.  
"He's going to be late again for training tomorrow"  
"Oh that's for sure"  
"What do you mean?"  
"I turned the security bots on and removed his facial ID from the compound database" and with that Bulma grinned, and it didn't seem like a motherly thing at all.  
"In that case, I'll put some caustic soda into his battling suit at the next training session, to make sure the cuts are unforgettable"  
"Vegeta!"  
"What? You set up an ambush with deadly weapons, I want my share of fun!"  
"Don't be ridiculous, I am doing that to give the boy a lesson, I don't take pleasure out of it"  
"Yeah, sure"

Bulma went to pour herself a cup of tea, just to discover her mate had already emptied the pot.  
While she was busy making some more, Vegeta turned his attention to the forgotten television that was now broadcasting a live filming of a war zone territory.  
Some riotous men were chasing around with automatic guns, and even if the camera was standing quite far away, it was possible to see people running in fear, while others were held prisoners by the guerrillas or shot to death.  
The Sayajin watched the scene with the usual detachment, yet he found himself dealing with a strange sense of unease. That was becoming a common occurrence lately.  
However he tried to conceal his true self under this family guy role, he really was still a Sayajin, raised as a true Sayajin and thus accustomed to a day to day basis violence.  
After the birth of Bulla he had decided to lead an honest life as a human being, decision that had not been abrupt.  
He had spent several years assessing his relationship with Bulma, also valuating the consequences of giving up his educational background for good.  
In the end he had to admit the few years with the Onna had felt more satisfying than all his previous life as planets destroyer.  
Living, for a Sayajin, meant a path of self improvement in the pursue of power and greatness.  
An hard lesson learned under the Freezer dominance had been that power, without control, was nothing. And control without self balance was out of league.  
Bulma was his mean to regain balance, or so he'd hoped.  
The Buu accident had been quite the proverbial cold shower.

"That's gross!" The woman voice put him out of his reverie  
Bulma was looking at the screen as well.  
"I understand the need to be informed, but to show those kind of things on television while I'm eating... honestly, they put action movies in late time slots because of fake violence and then broadcast real killings on dinner time"  
Vegeta looked at the disgusted face of the woman and the bad feeling deepened.  
He was sincerely perplexed over how she seemed to agree to his species moral values that condemned murder, and managed to put up with him, a multiple homicide, at the same time.

As soon as Bulma glanced at him, Vegeta quickly returned his attention to the rice rolls, but she had noticed his discomfort.  
"Wanna talk about it?"  
"About what?"  
"Whatever is bugging you and you are too stubborn to mention"  
"Or maybe uneasy"  
"Stubborn and uneasy then"

Vegeta sighed heavily.

"Fine, woman, but this conversation you won't like"  
Bulma picked up the remote, turned off the television and came back to her sit.  
"Shoot"  
Vegeta caught the irony.  
"That's a funny choice of words for addressing a murderer, you know"  
"Is this the problem? You feeling ashamed of your past?"  
"I do not feel ashamed of my past woman. I am a Sayajin, I simply don't care"  
"That's debatable..."  
Bulma said that smiling, but when Vegeta remained silent, she urged him on.  
"What's the matter then?"

Vegeta grew tense  
"The matter is that you are not ashamed either"  
"Excuse me?"  
"You seem so proud of your non-violence elating culture that you're constantly trying to convert me to it and yet, you decided to take me as a companion. Me, an alien who doesn't just love to use his force to kill others, but that is not even touched by the loss and pain that he had caused"  
Bulma waited for the bottom line.  
"Doesn't that bother you at all? Aside from the lust or affection that we might have shared in these years, I am still myself, I am still that person and I do not feel guilty about it, and you know that"

Yes, Bulma wasn't liking where the conversation was going, none bit; but Vegeta seemed to really need an answer.  
Granted, she wasn't sure she could give one.

"I do. I do feel ashamed, I do feel bothered... not because of you, but because I like you. I've never been in doubt of my liking for you and that sometimes makes me feel guilty"

A typical Vegeta snort of disbelief could suddenly be heard echoing in the otherwise silent kitchen.

"That is not possible, you didn't like me at all when I came to your planet for the first time and certainly you didn't like the fact I killed your friends. And before you object, I know that because you screamed it at me in various occasions"  
"Ok, ok, I'm not saying I've always cherished an unconditioned love toward you, and yes I loathed you for killing my friends. The point is, when I was given a chance to know you, you got me. The time that I invited you to stay at my house was out of curiosity. I feared you and, at a certain level, I was disgusted by you being so inhuman; but even back then there was something in you, something I wasn't going to admit existed that dragged me into this relationship. And I'm guessing now that it was similarity. Similarity with myself"  
"We are not similar"  
"If I recall correctly you are the one who cared enough to demonstrate that we are. And before you object, I know that because you screamed it at me in various occasions. How I use my intellectual abilities to gain power, no matter what; how I keep people in constant need of my technology to make them feel inferior and in debt; how I will eliminate any obstacle on my way... and, I may add now, how I killed lots of people for my own benefit without giving a shit"  
"You didn't..."

Bulma raised up and went to her briefcase that she had left on the sofa at the entrance.  
She came back with an A4 touch pad, turned it on and after some clicking handled it to Vegeta.  
"This is the list of items Capsule Corporation sold this week"  
"I don't get it"  
"The folder you are seeing now is the weapon inventory: guns, rifles, antitank mines, missiles, mass destruction bombs... you pick one"

Vegeta took some time to scroll over the enormous list.  
"We made over a 7 million zenis in killing devices this month only and this is a relatively pacific period. Did you honestly think we became this rich just on cars and motorcycles? As all the major multinational enterprises that work with experimental technology, Capsule is mainly financed by the military. We pay our science breakthroughs over the death of millions of people"  
Bulma searched her mate for some reaction but he was still looking at the pad when he spoke.  
"That it is something I didn't expect from you and especially not from your father; but I've learned that hypocrisy is one of the predominant characteristic of human nature. This trading doesn't make you look like a good person for human standards and surely makes you a huge hypocrite for getting indignant over those TV images; and yet, this just states my case"  
"What are you on about? I just proved to you that I could do anything for the sake of an invention, for my attachment to scientific progress. If it isn't that a reason for not caring about your past, I don't know what is"

"An hypocrite, by definition, is someone professing a belief that he or she doesn't hold when turning to actions. You may be a war supporter while that is limited to gaining money for your work, but if that work were to be taken away, you wouldn't allow those action to take place, because you still hate them, you still want to profess the belief that those actions are wrong"  
"And how does that make me any different from a killer, different from you? I still cause death even if for a reason"  
"The difference is that for me those killings *were* the reason. A Sayajin doesn't think murder is wrong"  
"From what I have seen and heard of Sayajins, you think only a challenging battle is valuable, I seriously doubt you went for those useless genocide missions on you own free will"  
"I did it because I was commanded to, yet I could refuse, my life wasn't at stake. I would have been reprimanded and possibly sent away. I simply didn't feel bad about it and I indulged Freezer so to remain in his army until I was ready to strike"  
"So you had a purpose"  
"And I'm pretty sure that in my position you wouldn't have killed off those planets just for the sake of a personal purpose, woman, being that science or whatever. It's one thing to sell means of destruction, quite another to use them"  
" You are probably right. I could argue that everybody is capable of anything for the right price, but yes, if I were in you place I wouldn't have done it."  
"See, I am a far greater bastard than you think"  
Bulma laughed in spite of everything  
"Oh I am aware of that... but you know, when it comes to relate with you on a personal basis, I still like you."  
"That is because of the sex, woman" Vegeta was smirking, he was a bastard alright.  
"Don't make me look like a whore, I already feel bad about my selfishness for loving a mass murderer without you worsening the situation"  
"So you do put up with me for the sex"  
"I put up with you for many reasons, among which sex covers a very collateral role"  
The Sayajin smug expression did not falter, but she knew he was still waiting for the real explanation.

"You already know the answer, Vegeta, it is just that you don't want to accept it"  
"Are you going to tell me you believed I had a heart somewhere and that I could be a good man if I applied"  
"As ridiculous as it may seem, that is the reason *you* are putting up with *me*. You were desperately in search for serenity, Ouji... for a place to be, far from the darkness that had characterized your life for so long. You hate to admit it, but Kakarot has pulled some strings in you that have nothing to do with your pride, nor your fighting skills. He was happy and you weren't. Everyone needs to be wanted, even you. You couldn't be happy by yourself and you were tired of constantly defending your goals from the judgment of others. You were tired to be feared and not be simply understood. The pursuing of the Super Sayajin level was the thing that made you survive, but it wasn't enough for making you live"  
"Stop that."  
"Stop what?"  
"Rummaging in my head"  
"But I'm right"  
"And you also switched topic, we were talking about you, Onna"  
"You tease me, I push you... Otoko"  
Speaking of murderous intentions, the face of Vegeta was quite expressive  
"Well, OK, OK, I'll stick to the point then"  
"You better"

Bulma sighed

"I don't want you to think that I walked into our relationship unaware of what you are, I'm wiser than that"  
"Sometimes I doubt it"  
"Well sometimes you underestimate our relationship"  
"I just put it into perspective. We are surprisingly efficient together, that is true, since I live here I am indeed able to better focus on my self development, both physical and mental, because I don't waste so much energy on being pissed off with the world, I guess. This makes our current arrangement a favorable deal on my part, but that's it. It is a deal, woman, a settlement made for logical reasons. But what if they weren't so logical? What if *you* were to draw conclusions, was it really that justifiable to engage to a being who, by your own definition, was -and still is- deeply inhuman?"  
"Maybe I didn't want a human, maybe I wanted someone that could relate to me without those blasted human values getting in the way."

There was a poignant pause after that. In which Vegeta was reminded of exactly how cold this woman could get. And how much he liked it.

"Maybe I chose you because you've experienced the worst and the best of life with so much intensity and yet you keep dealing with it from afar, like the world is behind a giant glass and you are seeing it all with one glance, unfazed."

Bulma looked at Vegeta, right in the eyes, there she could read the impatience of someone who has waited a lifetime just to have the truth finally coming unfolded in front of him. He was there, they were there, inches from that discovery; but reality is often more simple than the models we create of it in our head. While she was speaking, Bulma realized that Vegeta did really have that answer already, he just never looked at it.

"I am a scientist, I like to use my brain to examine, understand and exploit what's around me to create new stuff, to expand myself, to explore the unknown. This is what makes my life worth living and this is what I desperately needed for someone to comprehend and respect. There's not end to my quest for knowledge and, as my data increase, so does the need to define a greater picture, to ultimately look at things from a larger perspective."  
"You thought I was out of context enough to give you that?"  
"I knew you were out of context enough to give an objective point of view on my world, I found out you were also bold and uncaring enough to get in my head and tell me what you saw. You didn't get scared or, worse, compassionate, you just faced me for what I am. Vegeta, I am fully plunged into my context and I am bond with chains I can't see. I hate myself for my helplessness and I blame everyone around me for that. I boss people, I manipulate them, because in the end I think they are my limit. You get that and you don't condemn me for it. When my emotions come undone, you just take them... no flattery, no indulgence, no fake complying. You let me get rid of them"

Bulla chose that moment to return her dishes to the sink, she gave her parents a puzzled look noticing the strange expression on their faces, but she thought better than to interrupt them. Without taking off her earphones, she simply switched the player on the next pop song, dropped her charge on the counter and made her way back to her room with a rapid - g' night-

Vegeta didn't even make an attempt at answering his daughter, he was sill looking at Bulma who started to clear the table.

"You brushed aside the fact I am a killer for that?"  
"You know, for being a prince with an high self esteem you really seem to be questioning your value a lot"  
"I don't question my value, I was simply wondering about your reasons"  
"Naturally, how silly of me to think that you felt dirty for being a murderer"  
"You said it yourself, I'm out of context... I'll like to keep it that way. You seem to like it, anyway"  
"Yes and Kami forbid you mingle with this unworthy earthlings by sharing their loathe for violence"  
"Your customers didn't seem to mind violence, though"  
"Violence often is just a response to other violence"  
"Said the weapons dealer"  
"Teased the alien worlds eraser"  
"My title still beats yours, I see"  
"And so does your bad reputation"  
"I try"

With a final glance at his mate, the Sayajin no ouji shaked his head and made it to the door, the night was still young and he had a battle suit to stuff with soda.  
Turning the tap on, Bulma grinned and when Vegeta was almost out in the courtyard, she raised her voice to make a last remark.  
"You know, come to think of it, since any crime is relative to the context, if I was a person out of context trying to make peace with my conscience, I'd probably start by asking the people I love if I was worth some forgiveness"  
She couldn't see him and there was no indication whatsoever that he had heard her, but damn she could feel him smiling.


End file.
